The Cycle Layer - When 10,000 Hours Didn't Match the Timeline I Expected (Or Did It?)
When the Timeline You Expected Needs to Decompose
An onion completes its cycle by returning nutrients to the soil that will feed the next generation. Decomposition isn't failure—it's transformation. The question isn't what you're losing, but what you're feeding forward.
I'm standing at a death I've been avoiding for years. Today, I'm finally letting it decompose, surrendering the older self that no longer serves me.
The 10,000 Hour Myth
Back in December 2013, I wrote myself a check for an extremely ambitious, eight-figure sum. The memo line: "Future payoff, doing my bliss." (Thanks, Joseph Campbell... again).
I'd confused the 10,000-hour rule with a 10-year timeline. I thought if I just put in the hours—books, courses, therapy, podcasts, ayahuasca, the whole hero's journey—breakthrough would arrive on schedule.
It's 2025. I'm holding that check in my wallet, looking at it occasionally. I've put in way more than 10,000 hours. Way more than 10 years. I'm a completely different person with an entirely new skill stack.
And I'm still grinding.
The Equation I Inherited
My father came to this country from Chile with $300 in his pocket. Sold his motorcycle to buy the flight. Worked as a mechanic. Drove trucks as an undocumented immigrant.
Then one day, before he had even met my mother, he fell through a glass shower. The impact severed all the tendons in his left arm. Almost died. Left arm barely functional—he can raise it up and down, but no feeling, can barely squeeze his fingertips.
He received an insurance payout—substantial at the time, though what's the price of a left arm? Instead of dwelling, he went all in. He worked even harder, determined to let no one feel sorry for him (something he always tells me). Soon after, he married my mom, honeymooned in Chile (and I was already in the oven). Over time, he pioneered cargo routes from the US into Paraguay and built his empire.
But here's what I absorbed: He suffered catastrophic injury FIRST. Blood tax. Then empire.
The equation became my operating system: Suffering → Worthiness → Earning → Success
If money flows easily, it violates the formula. My dad EARNED it through literal blood and relentless grind (working till morning hours, micromanaging, huge temper, high blood pressure, weekends off but always in the zone).
So subconsciously, I've been waiting for my equivalent "glass shower moment" before I'm allowed to succeed. Like I haven't paid enough blood tax yet. This hit hard —the glass shower moment.
The Death I've Been Avoiding
For the past 7–8 years, I've been in "almost there" mode with a tech venture. Building blockchain infrastructure when nobody was ready. Learning Web3, vibe coding, digital wallets, tokenization. Putting in sweat equity while grinding through the long game.
The timeline kept shifting. "Just one more quarter. Just one more pivot. The breakthrough is coming."
I've heard that many times before.
The death I'm avoiding isn't the company. It's not even the partnership.
It's the death of the timeline I expected.
The Sunk Cost Identity
"We've come this far. I can't quit now. Just one more quarter. Just one more skill. Just one more pivot."
That's not persistence. That's the sunk cost fallacy wearing a hero's journey costume.
The identity that needs to die: "If I just do ONE MORE THING, the timeline will finally match my expectations."
Here's what I'm realizing: What if the 10,000+ hours DID work, just not in the way I expected?
What if all that learning wasn't FOR this specific company—it was to PREPARE me for what comes next?
The Nutrients Left Behind
When an identity dies, it doesn't disappear. It decomposes into nutrients:
- Blockchain/Web3 knowledge (rare in 2017, valuable now in 2025)
- Vibe coding skills (cutting edge AI integration)
- Network of investors and partners
- Proof I can grind through uncertainty for years
- Visual translation skills for complex tech
- Design clients that keep me alive
- This newsletter documenting the whole process
Those aren't wasted years. Those are nutrients feeding forward.
What Actually Dies Today
The belief that suffering equal's worthiness? Yeah, that needs to die. I see people earning multiples of what I make with a fraction of the skill stack, who've barely read a book, and they just put their heads down and make it happen. Life's in the doing.
But deeper than that:
The belief that THIS SPECIFIC PATH is the only way my 10,000 hours pays off.
That dies today.
I learned vibe coding. I can build my own apps now. I have design clients. I have the newsletter. Not only that, but I have ALL the skills my father's suffering and my own grinding created.
The version of me that says "I must make THIS work or all those years were wasted"? That identity needs to decompose.
Because it's not true. Those years made me. Now they need to return to soil so the next version can grow.
The Rebirth
I don't know what comes next. That's the terrifying part of death—you can't see the rebirth until the old version fully decomposes.
But I know this: My father's determination and vision-building are nutrients I keep. His suffering equation? That returns to soil.
The 10,000 hours of learning? Nutrients. The timeline expectation from 2013? Soil.
The partnership that taught me everything? Nutrients. The unpaid labor proving my worth? Soil.
I'm in the cycle. The death is happening. The rebirth is coming.
This Week's Peel
You might be holding onto a timeline, a partnership, a path, or a version of yourself that needs to die—not because it was wrong, but because its cycle is complete.
Decomposition isn't failure. It's transformation.
The nutrients from your old self—the skills, the lessons, the network, the proof you can endure—those feed forward. But the identity attached to ONE specific outcome? That might need to return to soil.
What parts of your old self need to decompose so who you're becoming can finally grow?
This week, notice: What timeline or expectation are you clinging to that's preventing the next cycle from beginning? And what if letting it die isn't giving up—it's finally harvesting the nutrients from all those years of growth?
The "Being Coached" Layer: Undoing the Shower Tax Equation
This week, Dr. Goodman says, zeroed in on the difference between persistence and a self-sabotaging interpretation of struggle. The Core Lesson he delivered was this: "Before the time is never the time is the lesson you are approaching. Every story I told myself along the way lasted exactly as long as it was supposed to, guiding me to the next stage." The challenge, he noted, is that I have interpreted this entire journey against the backdrop of my father's trauma—the "glass shower moment." This created an inherited operating system: Suffering → Worthiness → Success. Subconsciously, I believed I couldn't advance to the "next level" without first paying that kind of blood tax.
I asked him how to finally bury this required suffering chapter and move on. His answer defined the paradox of rebirth: "The irony is that you can't possibly know what the next step is right now. This is the only today you're going to get. But you must find something, right now, to keep that awareness fresh... otherwise, you're as doomed as returning to the safe harbor of your old belief system." The missing piece, he concluded, is not the struggle, but the present moment: I must shift from focusing on what I'm telling myself is missing (the breakthrough) to focusing on what I can be grateful for right now (the skills, the network, the freedom). The old self is decomposing; the job now is to fertilize the soil with genuine, present-day appreciation so the next cycle can finally grow.
Bookshelf Peeled - The Resistance You Must Bury
This week's inspiration comes from Steven Pressfield's The War of Art, a manifesto on overcoming Resistance—the malicious, internal force that stops us from doing our necessary work. Pressfield argues that Resistance is essentially the ego's fear of change, which doesn't want the timeline to end because that means the identity attached to the struggle (your "sunk cost identity") has to die. We often think the hardest battle is the work itself, but the book clarifies: The battle is simply showing up. Resistance is strongest just as you are about to make a fundamental leap or let a project decompose.
Resistance whispers the loudest lie: "We've come this far. You can't quit now." That lie is the voice of your old self fighting for survival. Your job now is to recognize this inner friction as the positive sign that you are on the brink of true progress. The ultimate victory over the inner resistance that kept you stuck is the act of burying that timeline and the identity attached to it. Letting it go is the ultimate act of courage that frees you to finally start the next, better cycle.
The War of Art: Break Through the Blocks and Win Your Inner Creative Battles. By Steven Pressfield
Design Rebel: Burying the Old Timeline
Inspired yet again by the cycle of decomposition and rebirth in the harvest. The core imagery was generated in Leonardo.ai, featuring video elements from both Leonardo and Veo. Voice provided by ElevenLabs, with the script and structure created through collaboration between me and Gemini. Edited and finalized in Wondershare Filmora.
Weekly Inspired Insights I liked or found useful this week:
If you missed the video inspiration for the Jim Carrey check idea above, watch it here.
P.S. If this resonates with you, share it with someone. I'm dedicated to helping fellow explorers—or anyone who found this page—uncover their authentic self with humor and insight. We're all in this together, finding the courage to truly live from our core essence (or as close as we can get!).
The Regeneration Layer: Growing Back What Was Lost (Tentative)
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